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The OMFGVIRUS myth is cracking as even the CDC now acknowledges the death rate for Covid-19 is orders of magnitude lower than the apocalyptic future they once predicted for the nation. Unfortunately, it's too late - Americans have become quivering fear-addicts, desperate for their fix, devolving into semi-human pod people who literally screech and point, Invasion-of-the-Body-Snatchers-style, at the unmasked. The virus is disappearing from the UK so fast they don't know if they'll be able to rush what's sure to be an appallingly toxic vaccine to market - quel dommage!  - but that’s OK, there will always be a government ready & willing to use perfectly healthy populations as guinea pigs for the disturbing experiments of the pharmaceutical companies that fill their campaign coffers. It’s one big happy circle-jerk, & you’re not invited, except when it comes time to start forcibly penetrating people. With needles, you pervert, who do you think they are, Alan Dershowitz?

May 18: You’re with us or you’re with the virus; eeevil ChiComs; pod people run wild; have some moar fear

Democrat-linked group blames anti-lockdown protesters for virus' spread after tracking their phones

**'Made in China' increasingly unpopular as Trump puffs up China trade war

**Social distancing innovations ensure 'new normal' will be anything but

US Covid-19 death toll cracks 90,000 (let's pretend comorbidities don't exist, shall we?)

May 19: Reverse Robin Hood says what? Cuomo kills Grandma; entrapment extravaganza

JPMorgan CEO preemptively dodges the guillotine with phony show of caring about inequality

Cuomo holds NY healthcare system hostage, stepping up demands for federal bailout $

Declassified memo sheds light on Comey's 'no-suspicion' pursuit of Flynn 

May 20: American opportunism run amok; pigs, fish, & bears, oh my!

Covid-19 robocalls push lockdown-addled Americans over the edge - after stealing $13.4mn of their money

Defense Intelligence Agency pours cold water on Pompeo's claim Iran opposes Afghan peace

PETA stages bizarre, hypocritical in-game protest of fishing in Nintendo's Animal Crossing

PragerU relegated to 'reduced visibility' on Facebook after mythbusting polar bear video

May 21: Feminist misogyny; Joe Drool; FBI has a hammer; Americans don’t trust Fox Henhouse Guards Inc

**Disingenuous "feminist" attacks on Lana Del Rey prove her right better than she ever could

Trump 'destroys anything he touches,' says a slurring, subdued Biden

Corpus Christi naval air station shooting linked to terrorism by FBI

Americans' trust in Covid-19 vaccine sinks as more comprehend unsafe timetable & political points

May 22: Virtue-signal to victory; grab ‘em & jab ‘em; see plane crash; lockdowns kill 

**UC system ditches standardized tests in lawsuit dodge masquerading as grasp at ‘woke’ cred

UK judges rule state can vaccinate foster kids against their parents’ wishes

CCTV video shows PIA plane that crashed in Karachi explode

**We’ve known for weeks that lockdown suicides would outnumber Covid-19 deaths. Why was it ignored?

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Looking at a program like "Operation Warp Speed," in which the Trump administration picks the most corrupt pharmaceutical executive it can find, who oversaw the development of at least two vaccines documented to do significantly more harm than good (Pandemrix, Cervarix) and is heavily invested in a 'frontrunner' company making a totally new kind of vaccine (that has never made a vaccine before and thinks animal safety trials are for pussies); speeds up the development to a tiny fraction of the usual approval process so that even the biggest vaccine cheerleaders quail in terror, announces the military will be responsible for delivering the shots, and orders up a few hundred million 'special' needles in case anyone thinks you're not serious about actually doing something this crazy, I'm beginning to think that maybe the government doesn't have our best interests in mind! 

The preceding was sarcasm, a form of humor that went extinct in early 2020 when the absurdity unleashed on a daily basis imploded Poe's Law. Subsequently, attempting to parody an extreme point of view merely resulted in that point of view coming to exist somewhere in reality. Humanity quickly learned to stop making jokes, but not before civilization was nearly destroyed. Case in point - the concept referenced in the subject line of this post actually exists, in the mind of the WHO at least. Here, have a nice dancing virus

May 11: A plane in pain can't fly in the rain; salivating Soros; Twitter declares all uncertainty anathema

Lockheed Martin fixes 103 of 111 of F-35's life-threatening flaws, but don't worry, it's safe

Soros salivates at post-pandemic possibilities, predicting demise of Trump & Xi

Twitter expands definition of Covid-19 wrongthink to include 'unverified' & 'disputed' info - i.e. all science 

May 12: Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice...won't get fooled again

**It's no surprise fewer than 2 in 5 Americans trust the government on Covid-19 - they've been lied to for decades

Fauci & Paul lock horns over lockdown's impact on kids

**CNN preys on virus-fearing audience with bald-faced lie that 2/3 won't return to normal without vaccine

May 13: National insecurity state through the lens of the New Pearl Harbor & the New New Pearl Harbor

FBI accidentally reveals classified name of Saudi national who helped babysit 9/11 hijackers

**NY & Washington's contact tracing programs mask incompetence with authoritarianism

May 14: Clickbait sells but no one's buying; not so Bright testimony; US media wants moar dead Russians

**Buzzfeed cuts UK & Australia staff as woke clickbait succumbs to Covid-19

NIH 'whistleblower' says listen to scientists or die of plague

**Western media pouts over Russia's 'suspiciously' low Covid-19 death count

May 15: Koronavirus Kommissar strikes again; policing gets even moar racist; Covid-19 jab will probably kill you

Cuomo raises eyebrows with dueling deadlines as lockdown orders extended

**University researchers try to sneak AI-enabled phrenology into policing under cover of Covid-19 & precrime

**Trump's 'vaccine czar' already botched one vaccine response to a pandemic. Why give him another chance?

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You can invade some of the countries all of the time, but you can't invade all of the countries some of the time. i think that's how the saying goes, anyway. Ask Silvercorp, they're the experts at botched invasions. Meanwhile, the Fed has the great stinking chutzpah to blame the 1918 flu pandemic for the election of Hitler, even though it was German economic policies (with a little help from Wall Street) that were actually responsible. Preemptively shifting responsibility for WW3, or just an attempt to revise history while no one's looking? 

May 4: Defectors vs. defective; monopolies beget monopolies; beach wars engage

**North Korean defectors apologize for rumors about Kim Jong-un's death. Will media establishment?

GoogleApple contact tracing platform about to give birth to a litter of bouncing baby monopolies

Californians, New Yorkers defiantly take to the beach as governors tighten screws 

May 5: Fed blames flu for Hitler; college kids love censorship; Trump says not our piglets

**NY Fed blames 1918 flu for 1933 election of Hitler in futile grasp at revisionism

Three-quarters of US college kids want "threatening" ideas banned from campus

Trump disavows "Bay of Piglets" botched invasion of Venezuela 

May 6: First world problems; one percent problems; NYC commits seppuku; universities go Black Mirror; Facebook launches MiniTru

**'Health at Any Size' reveals hypocrisy with Adele skinny-shaming

Cuomo divvies up the state between his billionaire pals: Gates, Schmidt & Bloomberg

Too little, too late: NYC subway closes overnight for cleaning...after 3 months of pandemic

**Universities devising dystopian social credit "risk" score for students: coming soon to society at large

Facebook names Oversight Board, pissing off whole political spectrum

May 7: More 'rona in White House; hairdresser heroics; Australia & US suicides will dwarf OMFGVIRUS

Trump valet tests positive for Covid-19, setting media establishment gibbering

Texas hairdresser sprung from jail after reopening salon in defiance of lockdown

Australia & US facing massive suicide spike likely to dwarf coronavirus deaths 

May 8: "It would be called an invasion"

Trump pooh-poohs Bay of Piglets, promising Venezuela his full attention with "army" next time


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Grim Reaper Fauci is cheerleading for an expensive new drug developed by the same profiteers who brought the world "pre-exposure prophylaxis" for HIV. Keen observers might recall that the first time Fauci got his claws in on the ground floor of drug development, thousands of asymptomatic or mildly-symptomatic HIV patients died due to AZT treatment - indeed, since Fauci took over NIAID, US life expectancy has actually fallen for the first time in the country's history. But never mind that - let's let him use us as guinea pigs some more. It's the patriotic thing to do.

April 27: Memory hole yawns; NY can't pay rent or vote; dirt saves lives

**Incriminating Larry King Live episode featuring Tara Reade's mom gets memory-holed

NYC tenants' groups demand rent amnesty in 1-million-strong strike

New York cancels Democratic primary after Bernie booted from ballot

Dirt plays key role in blood-clotting, study says

April 28: Big Tech beats Big Brother; Pentagon pimps UFOs; Spain bleaches the beach; Cuomo wants your elders dead

Big Tech muscles out Big Brother in contact-trace race as senator demands criminal probe of Amazon

Pentagon's confirmation of UFO videos raises suspicions as to what they're distracting from

'Best of intentions' becomes new 'just following orders' as Spanish mayor apologizes for bleaching beach

Cuomo admits Covid-19 devastates nursing homes, but won't lift must-admit order

April 29: Everyone hates Amash; Google Meat-market; Moore bites the green thumb that feeds

Justin Amash's Libertarian Party candidacy unites #Resistance & #MAGA in hate

Google Meet goes freeware to challenge Zoom as survey reveals 3/5 Americans won't take the app

**Michael Moore finds his spine but loses his 'Big Climate' friends

April 30: Still hating Cuba after all these years; 'muricans are broke; NASA moons the taxpayer; boys will be old men

Cuba demands answers after assault-rifle-wielding man arrested in embassy shooting

1 in 7 Americans wouldn't seek Covid-19 care because $, but expensive drug touted as savior anyway

Boeing snubbed in lunar lander contract handout as Project Artemis deadlines loom

'Biden is Biden,' Pelosi warbles as Democrats' 'feminist' mask dissolves off their faces

May 1: Biden bombs; can't pay won't pay; no guns for you; Gilead cashes in

**Biden fumbles Morning Joe interview, hinting at incriminating evidence in U of Delaware archives

New Yorkers march on Albany & unfurl banners off bridges as rent strike begins on May Day

Trudeau outlaws 1,500 types of gun following world's dodgiest mass shooting (this year)

AZT redux? Remdesivir gets emergency approval after lukewarm clinical test results

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In the geopolitical equivalent of 'don't eat stuff off the sidewalk,' I caution against believing the word of North Korea's number-one enemy about the recounting the goings-on in North Korea. It's like going to Israeli media to learn about what's happening in Gaza - oh wait, "we" do that too. Going to Hong Kong media for news about China? Oops, "we" do that too. But we're the good guys, so we can be forgiven our errors of judgment, except when we build our foreign policy out of them. [Note to bots; the preceding is a phenomenon known as sarcasm, a rhetorical device deployed in the pre-coronavirus era in which human beings communicated using a forgotten linguistic variant called 'humor.' We know little about it other than that it was added to the mounting OMFGVIRUS death toll at some point in April 2020; may it rest in peace, or die trying].

The 2020 election is basically an irrelevancy contest at this point, but I was on CrossTalk discussing said irrelevancy contest, because Washington will cling to its meaningless pageantry until it no longer has fingers.

April 20: Facebook weaponizes your secrets; Big Business says 'does this make me look small?'; WTI WTF

Your data is our superpower: Facebook takes coronavirus symptom data slurping initiative global

**Shake Shack shamed into returning ill-gotten "small business" bounty while dozens more keep feasting on what you're owed

West Texas Intermediate oil futures plummet past zero for first time ever

Dow & US markets follow WTI into WTF territory

WTI WTF sparks outpouring of schadenfreude, memes, surrealism

April 21: Shale fail bail on the horizon?; Kim Jong-undead undead undead; diaper-diving with UC Global; Missouri opens Pandora's Litterbox

Trump orders Depts of Treasury & Energy to prepare oil industry rescue plan as prices scrape bottom

**Rumors of Kim Jong-un's death are greatly exaggerated, so why do MSM keep believing everything out of South Korea?

UC Global employees go diaper-diving & extort Ecuadorian official with stolen nudes in SpyQuest Assange Edition

**Missouri becomes first US state to sue China, paving the way for all victims of US war crimes to go crazy

April 22: Harvard says screw your education; de Blasio says Let them eat fireworks; Harvard says wait unscrew it; France says smoke'em if you've got'em

Harvard won't return $8.6mn in corona cash despite an endowment larger than 100 countries' GDP

De Blasio waxes patriotic about need for freedom-celebrating fireworks amid unconstitutional NYC lockdown

Harvard thinks twice about returning corona cash after Trump threatens to audit endowment

French study suggests nicotine protects smokers against coronavirus

April 23: WHO's on first; Cuomo's narrative collapses; corona cult ascendant; Greenland purchase expedition; Facebook loves pseudoscience

Pompeo spurns WHO as China heals its heartbreak with cash

1/5 NYers test positive for Covid-19 antibodies, torpedoing 'OMFGVIRUS' narrative

**Masks become talisman, handwashing becomes ritual, & public shaming goes full auto-da-fé: the Covid-19 cult is on the rise

USAID package & first consulate in 50 years comprise cheese in Greenland purchase trap

Facebook stops letting advertisers target 'pseudoscience fans' after hypocrisy of faux-"disinfo crusade" exposed

April 24: Don't shoot Lysol; white privilege scarier than Covid-19; Facebook axes Zoom middleman

**Trump didn't suggest injecting disinfectant, but good luck getting that from the media establishment

**Oxford women's studies professor laments UK developing vaccine will unleash secondary plague of British pride

Facebook rolls out Zoom competitor after videoconferencing platform slammed for leaking data to...Facebook

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